在走动的进程中寻找学习情势

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103 The One With the Thumb

写在头里的话

[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe is there.]

看老友记学塞尔维亚语这么些体系已经到第93期了,有人说,人与人矮小的不一样是智力的不一样,最大的分化是水滴石穿的出入。在成人的征程上可知百折不回做1件事确实十三分重大,而且坚持不渝不是靠不住的滴水穿石,而是有法子地去持之以恒。那么方法怎么找呢?

Phoebe: (entering) Hi guys!

学习不可能等,要在走路的长河中检索办法

All: Hey, Pheebs! Hi!

就算您先花上五天时间认真地思考到底应该怎么学波兰语,而且做了1个周详而又详细的安插,那么八日之后和您一块起来学保加新奥尔良语的小伙伴大概早已经记熟几百个单词了,而你却发现你花了四日做出的布署并不吻合您的实际学习景况,须要推倒重来。然后您又花了八日,做了1个新的求学计划,这样平昔下去,必然是把时光都浪费在了做未有用的布署上去了。

Ross: Hey. Oh, oh, how’d it go?

自家认为在念书那件事上,最棒是一面实践一边总括学习格局,而不是先做出一套方法来再拿来去实施。因为当您实践过之后自然会发觉什么的法门好用,什么样的秘籍倒霉用,好用的章程就足以百折不回下去,不好用的当然就会吐弃。

Phoebe: Um, not so good. He walked me to the subway and said ‘We
should do this again!’

互连网上有很多大神介绍本身的求学方法,大家都得以拿来尝试,假如试后发现适合自身,那最棒可是了。借使试后发现不切合本人就足以去试新的秘诀。就如一条路1样,本来未有路,是在不停地品尝以往,走得多了,才成了路。

All: Ohh. Ouch.

拿自家要好作为3个例证。笔者刚初叶背单词的时候是拿着词典背的,因为登时看了新东方新东方教育集团董事长俞敏洪的演讲,他说她背单词就是拿一本词典从a开首背,一向背到最终1页。笔者看完他的演说以往热血沸腾,也开始背词典,结果才背了两页就背不下来了,主要原因是有个别单词太多生僻,平时生活中根本用不到,小编1边背壹边盘算未来会用到这些词的机率,当本人意识太小的时候,差不离就平昔不重力了。所以本身就抛弃了那种背单词的主意。

Rachel: What? He said ‘we should do it again’, that’s good, right?

新生有一段时间听了此外叁个大神的享受,作者又起来听VOA,
而且作者会把质地都打字与印刷出来,标记出富有的生词,然后天天都记。我纪念当时上班的时候开会前本人都会拿出来记七个单词。结果有二遍笔者听了一篇关于尊敬野生动物的简报,然后开始记里边的生词。多少个同事见状自个儿正在记
“北美麋鹿”
这么些单词,三个对另三个说,“看人家多下武功”。另3个说,“笔者才不记那种单词呢,浪费时间”。笔者立即听了就像是当头棒喝,突然发现自身恐怕又找错了可行性。VOA里边的超越56%资料也是偏向于社会,政治,自然环境,和咱们的活着也有早晚的离开。不是说不能够学,而是应超越学好常用的,再去学那几个相比较合理。所以本身也放弃了那种学习方式。

Monica: Uh, no. Loosely(n. without regard to specific details or
exceptions) 
translated ‘We should do this again’ means ‘You will
never see me naked’.

直到今后作者选拔了看韩剧学罗马尼亚(România)语的措施。它的好玩的事剧情都以和大家的生存有关,所以用到的都以频仍词汇,而且仍是可以学习能够的表明方法,具体方法能够参见笔者前面写的看老友记学斯洛伐克共和国(The Slovak Republic)语(00七) –
怎样把斯拉维尼亚语学习轻松融入到平日生活中去
。当然假若在行进的进程中自个儿再遇上更好的艺术,作者还会坚决地接着去品尝。

Rachel: Since when?

上边就随之学习老友记吧。

Joey: Since always. It’s like dating language. Y’know, like ‘It’s
not you’ means ‘It is you’.

103 The One With theThumb

Chandler: Or ‘You’re such a nice guy’ means ‘I’m gonna be dating
leather-wearing alcoholics ( [,ælkə’hɔlɪk] n a
person who drinks alcohol to excess habitually) 
and complaining about
them to you’.

[Scene: Central Perk,everyone but Phoebe is there.]

Phoebe: Or, or, y’know, um, ‘I think we should see other people’
means ‘Ha, ha, I already am’.

Phoebe:(entering)Hi guys!

Rachel: And everybody knows this?

All:Hey, Phoebes! Hi!

Joey: Yeah. Cushions [‘kʊʃən] 缓和…的冲击 the blow
(n.打击)
.善意的假话

Ross:Hey. Oh, oh,how’d it go?

Chandler: Yeah, it’s like when you’re a kid, and your parents put
your dog to sleep安乐死
, and they tell you it went off
爆炸,离去
to live on some farm.

Phoebe:Um, not so good. He walked me to the subway and said ‘We
should do this again!’

Ross: That’s funny, that, no, because, uh, our parents actually did,
uh, send our dog off to live on a farm.

All: Oh h. Ouch.

Monica: Uh, Ross.

Rachel:What? He said ‘we should do it again’, that’s good, right?

Ross: What? Wh- hello? The Millners’ farm in Connecticut (n.
/kə’netikət/爱荷华(U.S.东北边的州))
? The Millners, they had this
unbelievable farm, they had horses, and, and rabbits that he could chase
and it was- it w- …..Oh my God, Chi Chi!

Monica:Uh, no. Loosely translated(粗略地翻译一下,He didn’t
reply your weichat
message, loosely translated, he doesn’t like
you.‘We should do this again’ means ‘You will never see me naked’.

Opening Credits

Rachel:Since when?

[Scene: Chandler and Joey’s, Chandler is helping Joey rehearse for a
part.]

Joey:Since always. It’s like dating language. Y’know, like ‘It’s not
you’ means ‘It isyou’.

Chandler: “So how does it feel knowing you’re about to die?”

Chandler:Or ‘You’re such a nice guy’ means ‘I’m gonna be dating
leather-wearing alcoholics (皮革族的醉汉)and complaining about
them to you’.

Joey: “Warden(n.[‘wɔrdn]the person in charge of a prison) , in
five minutes my pain will be over. But you’ll have to live with the
knowledge that you sent an honest man to die.”

Phoebe:Or, or,y’know, um, ‘I think we should see other people’ means
‘Ha, ha, I already am’.

Chandler: Hey, that was really good!

Rachel:And everybody knows this?

Joey: Thanks! Let’s keep going.

Joey:Yeah.Cushions the blow (给垫着简单,减缓打击。His hat
helped to cushion the blow.)
.

Chandler: Okay. “So. Whaddya 缩写 want from me, Damone, huh?”

Chandler:Yeah, it’s like when you’re a kid, and your parents put
your dog to sleep(put to sleep:杀死|使入睡)
, and they tell you it
went off to live on some farm.

Joey: “I just wanna go back to my cell(PRISON 监狱 a small room
in a prison or police station where prisoners are kept. ‘Cause in
my cell, I can smoke.”

Ross: That’s funny, that, no, because, uh, our parents actually did,
uh, send our dog off to live on a farm.

Chandler: “Smoke away.不停地吸烟,用吸烟打发(时光)

Monica:Uh, Ross.

(Joey takes out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.  He fumbles and
drops the lighter.  Then he lights a cigarett, takes a drag, and
coughs.)

Ross:What? Wh-hello? The Millners’ farm in Connecticut? The
Millners, they had this unbelievable farm, they had horses, and, and
rabbits that he could chase and it was- it w-.Oh my God, Chi Chi!

Chandler: I think this is probably why Damone smokes in his cell
alone.

译文:嗨,各位!

嘿, 菲比! 嗨!

嘿. 哦,哦,你的约会如何?

不是很好,他送我到地铁,然后说:”大家相应再来二次!”

哦,喔.

怎么啦?他说要再来贰回?那不是很好吧?

不,

错略来讲她说大家应有再来一遍代表你将不只怕再看看裸体的自身

如何时候那样子的?

一贯皆以如此,那是约会用语.就像是…”难题不是出在您”代表”就是你”

”你真好”代表”小编要和皮革族的大户约会

接下来向您抱怨.”

还有还有,”大家该试试别人”

表示”作者已和外人约会了”我们都懂?

对,那是好心的谎言

没错,

就如家长使少年儿童的狗安乐死时,他们会说,它跑到外人家农场去住了

真有意思

但是笔者爸妈是确实

把我们的狗送到外人农场去养了

呃, 罗斯

Mina家在康乃迪克州的农场

米纳家

她们家的农场相当厉害

有马还有可供追逐的兔子…

噢,我的天,芝芝

Joey: What?

Opening Credits

Chandler: Relax your hand!

[Scene:Chandler and Joey’s,Chandler is helping Joey rehearse for a
part.]


Chandler:“So how does it feel knowing you’re about to die?”

(Joey lets his wrist go limp.)

Joey:“Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you’ll have
to live with the knowledge(你要精通,Live with the knowledge that
your character is your destiny.)
that you sent an honest man to die.”

Chandler: Not so much!

Chandler:Hey, that was really good!

Joey: Whoah!

Joey:Thanks!Let’s keep going.

Chandler: Hey!

Chandler:Okay.”So. What did ya want from me, Damone, huh?”

Joey: Hey!

Joey:“I just wanna go back to my cell. ‘Cause in my cell, I can
smoke.”

Chandler: Alright, now try taking a puff.

Chandler:“Smoke away.”

(Joey tries and visibly winces.)

(Joey takes out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.  He fumbles and
drops the lighter.  Thenhe lights a cigarette, takes a drag, and
coughs.)

Chandler: Alright.. okay. No. Give it to me.

Chandler:I think this is probably why Damone smokes in his cell
alone.

Joey: No no no, I am not giving you a cigarette.

Joey:What?

Chandler: It’s fine, it’s fine. Look, do you wanna get this part, or
not? Here.

Chandler:Relax your hand!

(Joey reluctantly gives him the cigarette.)

(Joey lets his wrist go limp.)

Chandler: Don’t think of it as a cigarette. Think of it as the thing
that’s been missing from your hand. When you’re holding it, you feel
right. You feel complete.

Chandler:Not so much!

Joey: Y’miss it?

Joey:Whoah!

Chandler: Nah, not so much. Alright, now we smoke. (Takes a puff.)
Oh.. my.. God. (He continues to smoke.)

Chandler: Hey!

[Scene, Central Perk, everyone except Phoebe and Rachel is there.]

Joey:Hey!

Monica: No, no, no. They say it’s the same as the distance from the
tip of a guy’s thumb to the tip of his index finger.

Chandler:Alright, now try taking a puff(一口烟,也有泡芙的趣味。I
took a puff on the cigarette and
started coughing..

(The guys stretch out their fingers.)

(Joey tries and visibly winces.)

Joey: That’s ridiculous!

译文:“知道本人不久江湖有啥感受?”

“华顿,笔者的忧伤将在伍分钟内清除

但你得经受杀死了三个好人的悲苦!”

嗬,表演得真好!

是吗? 谢了,大家继续吧

好,“你要小编怎么办,

迪默,嗯?”

本人只想回去本人的囚室内,因为如此,小编才方可抽烟

您就在那里抽吧.

自家想那正是迪默自身多个在牢狱里吸烟的缘故

什么?

手放轻松,手腕自然点

别太过火

-哦! 嘿!

-嘿!

好, 吐口烟

Ross: Can I use.. either thumb?

Chandler:Alright..okay. No. Give it to me.

Rachel: (carrying a tray of drinks) Alright, don’t tell me, don’t
tell me! (Starts handing them out.) Decaf cappucino for Joey.. Coffee
black.. Late.. And an iced tea. I’m getting pretty good at this!

Joey:No no no, I am not giving you a cigarette.

All: Yeah. Yeah, excellent.

Chandler:It’s fine,it’s fine. Look, do you wanna get this part, or
not? Here.

Rachel: (leaving to serve others) Good for me!

(Joey reluctantly gives him the cigarette.)

(The gang swaps all the drinks for what they ordered as Phoebe enters. 
She sits down without saying hi.)

Chandler:Don’t think of it as a cigarette. Think of it as the thing
that’s been missing from your hand. When you’re holding it, you feel
right. You feel complete.

Joey: Y’okay, Phoebe?

Joey:Y’miss it?

Phoebe: Yeah- no- I’m just- it’s, I haven’t worked- It’s my bank.

Chandler:Nah, not so much. Alright, now we smoke. (Takes a puff.)
Oh.. my.. God. (He continues to smoke.)

Monica: What did they do to you?

译文:好呢,把它给本身来

不,作者不可能给您烟

不在乎的,你到底想不想演那些剧中人物?

好,

别把它当成是支烟,把它便是是您思念多时的事物。你拿着它的时候

你倍感自在你倍感满意

你很想它

没那么严重.

抽烟

噢,爽呀!

Phoebe: It’s nothing, it’s just- Okay. I’m going through my mail,
and I open up their monthly, you know, STATEMENT-

[Scene, Central Perk, everyone except Phoebe and Rachel is there.]

Ross: Easy.

Monica:No, no, no.They say it’s the same as the distance from the
tip of a guy’s thumb to the tip of his index
finger(拇指指尖到总人口指尖的离开).

Phoebe: – and there’s five hundred extra dollars in my account.

(The guys stretch out their fingers.)

Chandler: Oh, Satan’s minions at work again…

Joey:That’s ridiculous!

Phoebe: Yes, ’cause now I have to go down there, and deal with them.

Ross:Can I use..either thumb?

Joey: What are you talking about? Keep it!

Rachel:(carrying a tray of drinks) Alright, don’t tell me, don’t
tell me! (Starts handing them out.)
Decaf(脱因咖啡)cappuccino(卡布其诺)for Joey..Coffee black..
Late.. And an iced tea. I’m getting pretty good at this!

Phoebe: It’s not mine, I didn’t earn it, if I kept it, it would be
like stealing.

All:Yeah. Yeah,excellent.

Rachel: Yeah, but if you spent it, it would be like shopping!

Rachel:(leaving to serve others)Good for me(我好棒。Good for
you,你好棒)
!

Phoebe: Okay. Okay, let’s say I bought a really great pair of shoes.
Do you know what I’d hear, with every step I took? ‘Not-mine. Not-mine.
Not-mine.’ And even if I was happy, okay, and, and skipping-
‘Not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine’…

译文:他们说和拇指尖到食指尖的离开一样

那太荒唐了

任由哪个姆指都行?

别告诉作者…无咖啡因卡布其诺是乔依的,纯咖啡,拿铁,和冰茶

本身前几日早就很在行了。

对, 对, 太棒了

自作者真厉害。

子莯青青,多年民有公司工小编,坚贞不屈外语学习,不断探索分享新的求学格局。喜欢请关怀。

Monica: We’re with you. We got it.

(Chandler leans over the back of the couch out of sight.)

Phoebe: Okay. I’d- just- I’d never be able to enjoy it. It would be
like this giant karmic debt.

Rachel: Chandler, what are you doing?

Monica: (puling him up) Hey. Whaddya doing?

(Chandler tries to shrug nonchalantly but eventually he has to exhale a
mouthful of smoke.)

All: Oh! Oh, God!

Ross: What is this?!

Chandler: I’m smoking. I’m smoking, I’m smoking.

Phoebe: Oh, I can’t believe you! You’ve been so good, for three
years!

Chandler: And this- is my reward!

Ross: Hold on a second, alright? Just think about what you went
through the last time you quit.

Chandler: Okay, so this time I won’t quit!

All: Ohhh! Put it out!

Chandler: All right! I’m putting it out, I’m putting it out. (He
drops it in Phoebe’s coffee.)

Phoebe: Oh, no! I- I can’t drink this now!

Monica: Alright. I’m gonna go change, I’ve got a date.

Rachel: This Alan again? How’s it goin’?

Monica: ‘S’going pretty good, y’know? It’s nice, and, we’re having
fun.

Joey: So when do we get to meet the guy?

Monica: Let’s see, today’s Monday… Never.

All: Oh, come on! Come on!

Monica: No. Not after what happened with Steve.

Chandler: What are you talking about? We love Schhteve! Schhteve was
schhexy!.. Sorry.

Monica: Look, I don’t even know how I feel about him yet. Just give
me a chance to figure that out.

Rachel: Well, then can we meet him?

Monica: Nope. Schhorry.

[Scene: Iridium, Monica and Paula are at work.]

Monica: I mean, why should I let them meet him? I mean, I bring a
guy home, and within five minutes they’re all over him. I mean, they’re
like- coyotes, picking off the weak members of the herd.

Paula: Listen. As someone who’s seen more than her fair share of bad
beef, I’ll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they’re
your friends, they’re just looking out after you.

Monica: I know. I just wish that once, I’d bring a guy home that
they actually liked.

Paula: Well, you do realise the odds of that happening are a little
slimmer if they never get to meet the guy..

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, Chandler is smoking out on the balcony,
Phoebe is absent.]

Joey: Let it go, Ross.

Ross: Yeah, well, you didn’t know Chi Chi.

Monica: Do you all promise?

All: Yeah! We promise! We’ll be good!

Monica: (shouts to Chandler) Chandler? Do you promise to be good?

(Chandler makes a ‘Cross my heart’ sign.  It starts to rain and he taps
on the window.)

Joey: You can come in, but your filter-tipped little buddy has to
stay outside!

(Chandler sulkilty picks up a garbage can lid and uses it as an
umbrella.)

(Phoebe enters, walks to the couch, sits down, and begins to read a
letter without saying hi.)

Ross: Hey, Pheebs.

Phoebe: ‘Dear Ms. Buffay. Thank you for calling attention to our
error. We have credited your account with five hundred dollars. We’re
sorry for the inconvenience, and hope you’ll accept this- (Searches in
her purse) –football phone as our free gift.’ Do you believe this?!
Now I have a thousand dollars, and a football phone!

Rachel: What bank is this?

(The intercom buzzes.)

Monica: Hey. It’s him. (On the intercom) Who is it?

Alan: (on the intercom) It’s Alan.

Joey: (shouting to Chandler) Chandler! He’s here!

(Chandler comes in, dripping wet.)

Monica: (to all) Okay, please be good, please. Just remember how
much you all like me.

(She opens the door and Alan enters.)

Monica: Hi. Alan, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Alan.

Alan: Hi.

All: Hi, Alan.

Alan: I’ve heard schho much about all you guyschh!

(Everyone laughs.)

[Time lapse, Alan is leaving.]

Monica: (to Alan) Thanks. I’ll call you tomorrow. (Alan exits, to
all) Okay. Okay, let’s let the Alan-bashing begin. Who’s gonna take the
first shot, hmm?

(Silence.)

Monica: C’mon!

Ross: …I’ll go. Let’s start with the way he kept picking at- no,
I’m sorry, I can’t do this, can’t do this. We loved him.

All: Loved him! Yeah! He’s great!

Monica: Wait a minute! We’re talking about someone that I’m going
out with?

All: Yeah!

Rachel: And did you notice…? (She spreads her thumb and index
finger.)

The Guys: (reluctantly) Yeah.

Joey: Know what was great? The way his smile was kinda crooked.

Phoebe: Yes, yes! Like the man in the shoe!

Ross: …What shoe?

Phoebe: From the nursery rhyme. ‘There was a crooked man, Who had a
crooked smile, Who lived in a shoe, For a… while…’

(Dubious pause.)

Ross: …So I think Alan will become the yardstick against which all
future boyfriends will be measured.

Rachel: What future boyfriends? Nono, I th- I think this could be,
y’know, it.

Monica: Really!

Chandler: Oh, yeah. I’d marry him just for his David Hasselhof
impression alone. You know I’m gonna be doing that at parties, right?
(Does the impression)

Ross: You know what I like most about him, though?

All: What?

Ross: The way he makes me feel about myself.

All: Yeah…

Commercial Break

[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is alone as Ross, Rachel, Chandler, and
Joey enter dejectedly in softball gear.]

Monica: Hi.. how was the game?

Ross: Well..

All: WE WON!! Thank you! Yes!

Monica: Fantastic! I have one question: How is that possible?

Joey: Alan.

Ross: He was unbelievable. He was like that-that-that Bugs Bunny
cartoon where Bugs is playing all the positions, right, but instead of
Bugs it was first base-Alan, second base-Alan, third base-…

Rachel: I mean, it-it was like, it was like he made us into a team.

Chandler: Yep, we sure showed those Hassidic jewellers a thing or
two about softball..

Monica: Can I ask you guys a question? D’you ever think that Alan is
maybe.. sometimes..

Ross: What?

Monica: ..I dunno, a little too Alan?

Rachel: Well, no. That’s impossible. You can never be too Alan.

Ross: Yeah, it’s his, uh, innate Alan-ness that-that-that we adore.

Chandler: I personally could have a gallon of Alan.

[Scene: A street, Phoebe walks up to a homeless person (Lizzie) she
knows.]

Phoebe: Hey, Lizzie.

Lizzie: Hey, Weird Girl.

Phoebe: I brought you alphabet soup.

Lizzie: Did you pick out the vowels?

Phoebe: Yes. But I left in the Ys. ‘Cause, y’know, “sometimes y”.
Uh, I also have something else for you. (She searches in her purse.)

Lizzie: Saltines?

Phoebe: No, but would you like a thousand dollars and a football
phone?

Lizzie: What? (She opens the envelope Phoebe has given her.) Oh my
God, there’s really money in here.

Phoebe: I know.

Lizzie: Weird Girl, what are you doing?

Phoebe: No, I want you to have it. I don’t want it.

Lizzie: No, no, I ha-I have to give you something.

Phoebe: Oh, that’s fine, no.

Lizzie: Would you like my tin-foil hat?

Phoebe: No. ‘Cause you need that. No, it’s okay, thanks.

Lizzie: Please, let me do something.

Phoebe: Okay, alright, you buy me a soda, and then we’re even. Okay?

Lizzie: Okay.

Phoebe: Okay.

[Scene: Chandler’s office, Chandler looks around, opens his desk
drawer, takes a puff of a cigarette, sprays around some air freshener,
and takes some breath spray.  He types for a little while, opens the
drawer again, and takes another drag of the cigarette.   While not
paying attention, he sprays the breath spray around the room, takes a
squirt of air freshener and gags.]

[Scene: A Street, Phoebe and Lizzie are at a hot dog vendor.]

Lizzie: Keep the change. (To Phoebe) Sure you don’t wanna pretzel?

Phoebe: No, I’m fine.

Lizzie: (leaves) See ya.

(Phoebe opens the can and reacts.)

Phoebe: Huh!

[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is telling everyone about her discovery.]

Ross: A thumb?!

(Phoebe nods.)

All: Eww!

Phoebe: I know! I know, I opened it up and there it was, just
floating in there, like this tiny little hitch-hiker!

Chandler: Well, maybe it’s a contest, y’know? Like, collect all
five?

Phoebe: Does, um, anyone wanna see?

All: Nooo!

(Chandler lights a cigarette.)

All: Oh, hey, don’t do that! Cut it out!

Rachel: It’s worse than the thumb!

Chandler: Hey, this is so unfair!

Monica: Oh, why is it unfair?

Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey’s constant
knuckle-cracking isn’t annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing
every single word? And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean,
what the hell is that thing? …I accept all those flaws, why can’t you
accept me for this?

(An awkward silence ensues.)

Joey: …Does the knuckle-cracking bother everybody?

Rachel: Well, I-I could live without it.

Joey: Well, is it, like, a little annoying, or is it like when
Phoebe chews her hair?

(Phoebe spits out her hair.)

Ross: Oh, now, don’t listen to him, Pheebs, I think it’s endearing.

Joey: Oh, (Imitating Ross) “you do, do you”?

(Monica laughs and snorts.)

Ross: You know, there’s nothing wrong with speaking correctly.

Rachel: “Indeed there isn’t”… I should really get back to work.

Phoebe: Yeah, ’cause otherwise someone might get what they actually
ordered.

Rachel: Ohh-ho-hooohhh. The hair comes out, and the gloves come on.

(They degenerate into bickering and Chandler happily starts to smoke,
undisturbed.)

[Scene: Iridium, Monica and Paula are working.]

Monica: Did you ever go out with a guy your friends all really like?

Paula: No.

Monica: Okay.. Well, I’m going out with a guy my friends all really
like.

Paula: Waitwait.. we talking about the coyotes here? All right, a
cow got through!

Monica: Can you believe it? …Y’know what? I just don’t feel the
thing
. I mean, they feel the thing, I don’t feel the thing.

Paula: Honey.. you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that’s
how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him!

Monica: I know.. it’s gonna be really hard.

Paula: Well, he’s a big boy, he’ll get over it.

Monica: No, he’ll be fine. It’s the other five I’m worried about.

[Scene: Cental Perk, Joey and Ross are persecuting Chandler about his
smoking.]

Joey: Do you have any respect for your body?

Ross: Don’t you realise what you’re-you’re doing to yourself?

Chandler: Hey, y’know, I have had it with you guys and your cancer
and your emphysema and your heart disease. The bottom line is, smoking
is cool, and you know it.

Rachel: (holding the phone out to Chandler) Chandler? It’s Alan, he
wants to speak to you.

Chandler: Really? He does? (taking the phone) Hey, buddy, what’s up!
Oh, she told you about that, huh. Well, yeah, I have one now and then.
Well, yeah, now. Well, it’s not that big- ..well, that’s true,.. Gee,
y’know, no-one- no-one’s ever put it like that before. Well, okay,
thanks! (He hands the phone back and stubs out his cigarette.)

Rachel: (to Ross, who has wandered up) God, he’s good.

Ross: If only he were a woman.

Rachel: Yeah.

(They give each other a dubious look.)

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, everyond except Monica and Joey is
watching Lambchop.]

Chandler: Ooh, Lambchop. How old is that sock? If I had a sock on my
hand for thirty years it’d be talking too.

Ross: Okay. I think it’s time to change somebody’s nicotine patch.
(Does so.)

Monica: (entering) Hey. Where’s Joey?

Chandler: Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. Do you
think that was wrong?

Rachel: I think he’s across the hall.

Monica: Thanks. (Goes to fetch him.)

Ross: (finishing changing Chandler’s nicotine patch) There y’go.

Chandler: (deadpan) Ooh, I’m alive with pleasure now.

Ross: Hey Pheebs, you gonna have the rest of that Pop-Tart?..
Pheebs?

Phoebe: Does anyone want the rest of this Pop-Tart?

Ross: Hey, I might!

Phoebe: Sorry. ..Y’know, those stupid soda people gave me seven
thousand dollars for the thumb.

All: You’re kidding. Oh my God.

Phoebe: And on my way over here, I stepped in gum. …What is up
with the universe?!

Joey: (dragged in by Monica, he has just gotten out of the shower)
What’s going on?

Monica: Nothing. I just think it’s nice when we’re all here
together.

Joey: Even nicer when everyone gets to wear their underwear..

Rachel: Uh, Joey..

Joey: Oh, God! (Hurriedly closes his legs.)

Monica: (turns off the TV) Okay..

All: Oh! That was Lambchop!

Monica: Please, guys, we have to talk.

Phoebe: Wait, wait, I’m getting a deja vu…no, I’m not.

Monica: Alright, we have to talk.

Phoebe: There it is!

Monica: Okay. It’s-it’s about Alan. There’s something that you
should know. I mean, there’s really no easy way to say this.. uh.. I’ve
decided to break up with Alan.

(They all gasp and clutch each other.)

Ross: Is there somebody else?

Monica: No, nononono.. it’s just.. things change. People change.

Rachel: We didn’t change..

Joey: So that’s it? It’s over? Just like that?

Phoebe: You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care
about someone, and I just- I- (starts chewing her hair)

Monica: Look, I- I could go on pretending-

Joey: Okay!

Monica: -but that wouldn’t be fair to me, it wouldn’t be fair to
Alan- It wouldn’t be fair to you!

Ross: Who-who wants fair? Y’know, I just want things back. Y’know,
the way they were.

Monica: I’m sorry..

Chandler: (sarcastic) Oh, she’s sorry! I feel better!

Rachel: (tearful) I just can’t believe this! I mean, with the
holidays coming up- I wanted him to meet my family-

Monica: I’ll meet somone else. There’ll be other Alans.

All: Oh, yeah! Right!

Monica: Are you guys gonna be okay?

Ross: Hey hey, we’ll be fine. We’re just gonna need a little time.

Monica: (dubious) I understand.

[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica is breaking the news to Alan.]

Alan: Wow.

Monica: I’m, I’m really sorry.

Alan: Yeah, I’m sorry too. But, I gotta tell you, I am a little
relieved.

Monica: Relieved?

Alan: Yeah, well, I had a great time with you.. I just can’t stand
your friends.

Closing Credits

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, everyone is mopping around and eating ice
cream.]

Rachel: Remember when we went to Central Park and rented boats?..
That was fun.

Ross: Yeah. He could row like a viking.

Monica: (entering) Hi.

All: Mmm.

Ross: So how’d it go?

Monica: Oh, y’know..

Phoebe: Did he mention us?

Monica: He said he’s really gonna miss you guys. (dubious look)

Ross: You had a rough day, huh.. c’mere. (She sits down and Ross
strokes her forehead.)

Chandler: …That’s it. I’m getting cigarettes.

All: No no no!

Chandler: (leaving) I don’t care, I don’t care! Game’s over! I’m
weak! I’ve gotta smoke! I’ve gotta have the smoke!

Phoebe: (shouting as he leaves) If you never smoke again I’ll give
you seven thousand dollars!

Chandler: (returns) Yeah, alright.

End

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